Who thinks we should start a compendium of analogies?

[norm1320]

I was talking to my sister yesterday, and trying to explain the difference between a virus and a rootkit. I told her that if a virus was a sniper, then a rootkit would be his gilly suit. (if you have a client with a military background, they'll get the general idea)

It got me thinking that perhaps we should start building a compendium of computer anaologies to use with our clients. Since we no doubt have techs here with all sorts of different backgrounds, we could make a list that was sufficiently comprehensive that we could explain anything to any of our clients, as long as we know a little about the client's background.

Sound like a good idea?

 

[Xander]

I usually equate a rootkit with a virus that does a Jedi Mind Trick on the computer.

 

[iptech]

I usually equate a rootkit with a virus that does a Jedi Mind Trick on the computer.

Boy do I feel I'm losing out because I deal with people who wouldn't have a clue what a Jedi Mind Trick was.

If George Lucas had heard of nuke'n'pave we could have been saved from The Phantom Menace.

 

[JosephLeo]

I've always found that relating cars to computers works the best. For example.

Me:
Sir I've discovered the problem with your computer.

Customer:
Really!? What was it?

Me:
Well, you have a faulty memory module and it needs to be replaced.

Customer:
Memory? You mean where my music and pictures is?

Me:
No sir that's the Hard Drive.

Customer:
Hard Drive?

Me:
Yes. Let's compare it to something more familiar sir. Do you own a car?

Customer:
Why yes, yes I do.

Me:
Okay, good. Then imagine your hard drive as your tack-o-meter, you know the thing that records your mileage and your memory as one of the important parts of your engine. The tack-o-meter is there to store information about your car and the engine is the part that keeps your car running.

Customer:
Okay, I seem to get it I guess.

 

[CapComp]

When I recommend to a client that their computer needs to be cleaned and they ask why?

"Computers are like vacuum cleaners without the bag."

It's concise, easy to understand, and creates the right mental image

If someone needs a real image I point them to a recent blog post I did, http://capablecomputers.com/capablecomputers/dirty-pc/

 

[Xander]

If someone needs a real image I point them to a recent blog post I did, http://capablecomputers.com/capablecomputers/dirty-pc/

It usually takes 20-30 minutes to do a cleaning depending on the amount of dirt.

20-30 minutes to blow out a box? Typo? Shouldn't that be more like 2-3 minutes? Even if I took a pipe cleaner to the CPU heatsink, I don't think I could take more than 5.

Now, if you're talking about including running all kinds of cleaning software on top of that, fine. (Well, even then, that'd only be a few more minutes...)

 

[iisjman07]

There's a library analogy which goes something like this:
-imagine your hard drive is like how many books your computer can hold
-imagine your pcs memory is like how many books you can have open on the table at once
-imagine your pcs CPU translates to how many pages you can read at once

 

[CapComp]

Agree if you are going to only blow out or vac it's 2-3 minutes.

I find with cleaning the older Dell systems I have to hand clean the system fans since compressed air doesn't remove the dust (pull the assembly and use cleaner wipes on the fan blades).

 

[ProTech Support]

Someone once mentioned comparing memory to a chalkboard, and I have always stuck with that.

Usually when I run into a customer that needs a memory upgrade, it usually goes like this:

___________________________________________________________________________________

Me: The best action here would be to upgrade your computer's memory.

Customer:

Me: Your computers memory is like a chalkboard. Every time you launch a program, it writes on the chalkboard. The more programs you have open, the more writing on the chalkboard. Once the chalkboard is full, you start to see the huge slow down. Adding more memory, is like getting a bigger chalkboard.

Customer: