Humor Section!

[GTP]

Linux also has some cool tricks! try these. Press "enter" after entering each command.

1.At the command line type:
aptitude moo then: aptitude -v -v moo then: aptitude -v -v -v moo then: aptitude -v -v -v -v moo then:

aptitude -v -v -v -v -v moo and finally: aptitude -v -v -v -v -v -v moo

2. Type: fortune | cowsay

3. Watch the whole "Star Wars" movie, in ASC11 text mode! type: telnet towel.blinkenlights.nl

4. Type: apt-get -help | grep -i super

5. Type: ddate

6. If you type: ddate 19 2 2017 you get a different output

7. Chat with a bot: telnet the-funk.net 7000

8: See your files and folders like never before. Type: tdfsb

 

[Moltuae]

blinkenlights

Reminds me of a sign I used to have next to my computer, at a place I worked back in the early 90's:

 

[SpaceSquad]

Just spotted this gem on Kijiji...

"I was robbed. Will work for computer."

 

[wavey]

Just had a guy in the shop, I didn't know how to answer him:
"I think my laptop hasn't got enough electricity, my mate tested it and said it needs more voltaires"

 

[Markverhyden]

Just had a guy in the shop, I didn't know how to answer him:
"I think my laptop hasn't got enough electricity, my mate tested it and said it needs more voltaires"

Oui monsieur...

 

[Moltuae]

Just had a guy in the shop, I didn't know how to answer him:
"I think my laptop hasn't got enough electricity, my mate tested it and said it needs more voltaires"

So, did you sell him some?

 

[coffee]

Just had a guy in the shop, I didn't know how to answer him:
"I think my laptop hasn't got enough electricity, my mate tested it and said it needs more voltaires"

Yes Sir,

Will 250 voltaires be enough for you?

 

[wavey]

So, did you sell him some?

he'll bring it in in a few days, can't wait.

 

[Altster]

Will 250 voltaires be enough for you?

Got a bit warm, didn't it?

 

[GTP]

Just had a guy in the shop, I didn't know how to answer him:
"I think my laptop hasn't got enough electricity, my mate tested it and said it needs more voltaires"

You could sell him a new "Voltaire" dispenser (PSU) and "Voltaire" storage device (battery) lol

 

[glennd]

You could sell him a new "Voltaire" dispenser (PSU) and "Voltaire" storage device (battery) lol

or start quoting French philosophy...

 

[Moltuae]

You could sell him a new "Voltaire" dispenser (PSU) and "Voltaire" storage device (battery) lol

Good idea

And wavey, you should install Chrome/Firefox too and tell him you've upgraded him to the latest version of the interwebs.

 

[wavey]

He reminded me of another customer, a few years back, who called in and asked if we sold 'small amps'.
Took a while to work out that he wanted a 3A fuse for a 3 pin plug LOL

 

[wavey]

or start quoting French philosophy...

Like this do you mean

“Judge a man by his questions rather than by his answers.”
― Voltaire

 

[Markverhyden]

Like this do you mean

“Judge a man by his questions rather than by his answers.”
― Voltaire

Modern take I use all the time. You know how customers always say they have a stupid question. I tell them there are no stupid questions, only stupid answers.

 

[wavey]

Modern take I use all the time. You know how customers always say they have a stupid question. I tell them there are no stupid questions, only stupid answers.

Couldn't agree more, I get so many customers calling themselves stupid because they know very little about their computers, I tell them we all have our areas of knowledge/ignorance.

 

[Moltuae]

I get so many customers calling themselves stupid because they know very little about their computers, I tell them we all have our areas of knowledge/ignorance.

I say something similar: I tell them "An inability to understand computers doesn't mean you're stupid, it just means you might be". "Let's see, what else can't you understand?"

 

[Mercenary Roadie]

Yes, there are no stupid questions.

But.

There are some really dumb ones.

 

[Altster]

Can you-all believe it? We are up to 52 pages of postings in this sub-board.

Who knew we could be so phunny?

 

[GTP]

Car makers Renault and Ford have joined forces to create the perfect small car for women.
Mixing the Renault 'Clio' and the Ford 'Taurus' they have designed the 'Clitaurus'.
It comes in pink, and the average male won't be able to find it - let alone turn it on - even if someone tells him where it is and how to do it.
Rumour has it though, it can be a real b**ch to start in the morning!
Some men have reported that on cold winter mornings, when you really need it, you can't get it to turn over.
New models are initially fun to own, but very costly to maintain, and horribly expensive to get rid of.
Used models may initially appear to have curb appeal and a low price, but eventually have an increased appetite for fuel, and the curb weight typically increases with age. Manufacturers are baffled as to how the size of the boot increases, but say that the paint may just make it LOOK bigger.
This model is not expected to reach collector status. Most owners find it is best to lease one, and replace when it becomes troublesome......