OldSchoolPC
New Member
- Reaction score
- 4
- Location
- East Greenville PA
Craigslist is a haven for the $30 pizza techs. Apparently a legitimate technician wrote this and posted it. He has good timing as this ad was right under an actual ad for a $30 tech. Enjoy
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Hi, we're total professionals. We don't look pretty and we have no girlfriends, but you know, that's what online porn is for. Anyway, for a mere $30, we will:
1. Install timer viruses onto your computer so that you have to keep calling us for repairs after 30 days.
2. Go through all your files; your personal stuff.
3. Copy all your private data to our machines and then systematically release the files onto the internet.
4. Find and use your credit card numbers so that we can buy stuff for our business.
5. Post your semi-nude personal photos you took in the bathroom mirror that day on Facebook.
6. Snap high resolution pics of our lily white butts and send them to everyone in your address book, right from your own email address.
7. Install proprietary spyware/malware so that we can always see what you're doing online.
8. Setup your system so that we can secretly control it remotely.
9. Delete key system files and dynamic link library (dll) files so that your software doesn't run right and we can then charge you for phone support.
10. Do our absolute best to treat you like a total idiot when you call for phone support.
11. Hot-glue all system cooling fans so they quit making so much noise, including CPU, power supply, and video card.
12. Generously spray the interior of the computer case with Liquid Ass.
13. Sign-up your personal email address to gay porn website Guestbooks all over the net.
14. Spray certain critical areas of your motherboard with WD-40.
15. Remove all heat-sinks, scrape off thermal paste, clean surfaces to perfection and then reinstall.
SUPER SPECIAL BONUS - Reply today, and get 50% off the above services! Yes, that's right....for a mere $15 we'll make sure your computer runs like a total piece of junk, your identity gets stolen, the entire world knows all about your personal life, and as a bonus, we'll even destroy it! All for a mere FIFTEEN DOLLARS! WOW....reply today!
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/////////
Hi, we're total professionals. We don't look pretty and we have no girlfriends, but you know, that's what online porn is for. Anyway, for a mere $30, we will:
1. Install timer viruses onto your computer so that you have to keep calling us for repairs after 30 days.
2. Go through all your files; your personal stuff.
3. Copy all your private data to our machines and then systematically release the files onto the internet.
4. Find and use your credit card numbers so that we can buy stuff for our business.
5. Post your semi-nude personal photos you took in the bathroom mirror that day on Facebook.
6. Snap high resolution pics of our lily white butts and send them to everyone in your address book, right from your own email address.
7. Install proprietary spyware/malware so that we can always see what you're doing online.
8. Setup your system so that we can secretly control it remotely.
9. Delete key system files and dynamic link library (dll) files so that your software doesn't run right and we can then charge you for phone support.
10. Do our absolute best to treat you like a total idiot when you call for phone support.
11. Hot-glue all system cooling fans so they quit making so much noise, including CPU, power supply, and video card.
12. Generously spray the interior of the computer case with Liquid Ass.
13. Sign-up your personal email address to gay porn website Guestbooks all over the net.
14. Spray certain critical areas of your motherboard with WD-40.
15. Remove all heat-sinks, scrape off thermal paste, clean surfaces to perfection and then reinstall.
SUPER SPECIAL BONUS - Reply today, and get 50% off the above services! Yes, that's right....for a mere $15 we'll make sure your computer runs like a total piece of junk, your identity gets stolen, the entire world knows all about your personal life, and as a bonus, we'll even destroy it! All for a mere FIFTEEN DOLLARS! WOW....reply today!
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Oh no 1 word.... RIDICULOUS
