Business Advert - Feedback

terinea

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Just looking for some feedback on A6 flyer I'm planning on sending to print in the next couple of days.

Thinking of placing them in couple of coffee shops as well post them to various businesses.

Thanks

Jamie
 

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Can't give you much beyond the obvious i.e. it looks great.

However, in my experience, flyers to business are not very effective - unless you're delivering them in person to the gatekeeper and accompanied by a "keepie" - preferably sweets and a pen.
 
You've dropped in the grocer's apostrophe on the rear, also if you're targeting businesses I wouldn't name prices on a flyer- £49 pays for what?

Personally I wouldn't use such a simplistic flyer for businesses, it's nearly all picture and there's no call for action. The image looks nice, but why use a child's hands? Most people would look for maturity & experience when looking for someone to nurture their business interests. My gnarled and wizen old hands are available for photo shoots at a competitive fee. :)
 
I assume the pen has your name and number on it - are the sweets also customized? If so do you order them or do it yourself somehow?

Yes indeed. They had my logo and number. The sweets were just apple drops with my logo and number on a stick on label. I bought them in the wholesalers for about 40c a packet. I used to do mouse mats but not since optical mice became ubiquitous. Another one that went down well was notepads.
 
You've dropped in the grocer's apostrophe on the rear, also if you're targeting businesses I wouldn't name prices on a flyer- £49 pays for what?

Personally I wouldn't use such a simplistic flyer for businesses, it's nearly all picture and there's no call for action. The image looks nice, but why use a child's hands? Most people would look for maturity & experience when looking for someone to nurture their business interests. My gnarled and wizen old hands are available for photo shoots at a competitive fee. :)


What I think about the child hands is that he is offering to help you grow your business. Maybe thats the line of thinking
 
@seedubya

Yeah I did think that delivering them to businesses might not work that well. Pen or something like that will have go in the next marketing run.

@iptech

£49 was going to be the basic network monitoring of clients systems along with a few other things. I would disagree they look like child's hands and have already used this a couple of times in marketing material. Originally I did have older hands but I could get the right picture.

Thanks for the offer of the hands, do you charge by the finger?

This is the feedback I got from twitter.

Re-leaflet. Looks good but lots about what you do, not a lot about why businesses need you to do it! You did ask...

Looking good - like the innovative design. Wish our marketing was so progressive!

Only design complaint, alignment on front: right, then left, then right again. Seems slightly messy, but not dire. Overall good job10:43 AM Jun 23rd from Nambu in reply to terinea

"Onsite" also a bit ropy. I suspect "On-site" is better10:25 AM Jun 23rd from Nambu in reply to terinea

"Apple Mac" redundant. Just "Mac" s/b ok these days (that's just my opinion)10:24 AM Jun 23rd from Nambu in reply to terinea

it's s/b its

is the apostrophe correct on the 3rd line of back? not my strong point but looks odd.

Jamie
 
Jamie, the apostrophe is not correct. It's = it is; Its = belonging to it. An apostrophe always replaces a letter.

Don't the marketeers say you should always mention benefits as opposed to features? (in response to the comment "lots about what you do, not a lot about why businesses need you to do it!")
 
I had it that way before but then someone in the office said it was wrong and as my grammar isn't the best I believed him!

Yeah I agree with that, benefits over your services.

New flyer to follow.

Thanks
 
@seedubya

Yeah I did think that delivering them to businesses might not work that well. Pen or something like that will have go in the next marketing run.

@iptech

£49 was going to be the basic network monitoring of clients systems along with a few other things. I would disagree they look like child's hands and have already used this a couple of times in marketing material. Originally I did have older hands but I could get the right picture.

Thanks for the offer of the hands, do you charge by the finger?

This is the feedback I got from twitter.

Re-leaflet. Looks good but lots about what you do, not a lot about why businesses need you to do it! You did ask...

Looking good - like the innovative design. Wish our marketing was so progressive!

Only design complaint, alignment on front: right, then left, then right again. Seems slightly messy, but not dire. Overall good job10:43 AM Jun 23rd from Nambu in reply to terinea

"Onsite" also a bit ropy. I suspect "On-site" is better10:25 AM Jun 23rd from Nambu in reply to terinea

"Apple Mac" redundant. Just "Mac" s/b ok these days (that's just my opinion)10:24 AM Jun 23rd from Nambu in reply to terinea

it's s/b its

is the apostrophe correct on the 3rd line of back? not my strong point but looks odd.

Jamie
You need to look at your flyer from the prospective customer perspective not yours. The image is very artistic, but it dominates your flyer and doesn't carry a clear message. Looking at it from a prospective client - all I've learnt from your expensive multi-colour flyer is that you want £49 from me and you lack an understanding of simple syntax. If I were looking for computer support and your flyer were to land amongst the other 9 I've also received today, there's no reason it should be put to the top of that pile.

Whether they're child's hands or not, that image is naive, if my business has been running through various generations or has been built up through my own skills, efforts and determination it doesn't need nurturing, but it does need reliable & dependable support. My plumber/electrician/fix-it man don't lay promise to nurture my business, but they do fix things when I need it and also help avoid catastrophic breakdowns- for that they're invaluable to my business success.
 
You need to look at your flyer from the prospective customer perspective not yours. The image is very artistic, but it dominates your flyer and doesn't carry a clear message. Looking at it from a prospective client - all I've learnt from your expensive multi-colour flyer is that you want £49 from me and you lack an understanding of simple syntax. If I were looking for computer support and your flyer were to land amongst the other 9 I've also received today, there's no reason it should be put to the top of that pile.

Whether they're child's hands or not, that image is naive, if my business has been running through various generations or has been built up through my own skills, efforts and determination it doesn't need nurturing, but it does need reliable & dependable support. My plumber/electrician/fix-it man don't lay promise to nurture my business, but they do fix things when I need it and also help avoid catastrophic breakdowns- for that they're invaluable to my business success.

Thanks again for your feedback, new flyer uploaded.

Ignore the triple s in business!

Jamie
 

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What's an IT survey?
How will your potential customers know what an IT survey is? I could have a guess but could be wrong, it's not entirely clear.

It could be a great offer, a FREE IT survey! That's if I or anybody else knew what exactly was being offered.

I think the look is great and very professional but the message as a sales tool is currently weak.

All the best.

Chris
 
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